Questioning Authority: “Tinderfella” gives us his female Tinder profile Don’ts

hqdefault (1)

In this episode of Questioning Authority, we’re going to look at a guy’s advice to women about their Tinder profiles. I can’t, of course, comment on the male experience, but I think the majority of his advice applies to all dating profiles. Let’s take a look…


1. First picture with multiple friends
Yep. This is a huge no-no, and yet everyone still does it. It truly baffles me. What’s the thought process here? Not only are you making it difficult for potential matches to figure out who you are, but you’re introducing competition in your own profile!

2. 50% selfies
I’m glad to see I’m not the only one who gets suspicious when the majority of photos on a profile are selfies. What’s the deal here? Are you THAT narcissistic, or do you just have no friends?

3. Bibles verses in their profile.
Now, this is one I have never, ever encountered. Maybe women are more likely to put them in their profile than men? Still, I’d move on pretty quickly if I did see this.

4. Heavy filter users
Again, this isn’t something I don’t see very often in men’s profiles, but I get it. You’re not fooling anyone.

5. First picture really far away or not facing the camera
It’s time to accept the fact that online dating is a largely superficial process. If someone can’t tell what you look like, they are unlikely to take the time to look any deeper. Besides, if you do manage to get a date with one the .001%* of people that don’t swipe past your useless photo, what do you think will happen? Is your personality so dazzling that it won’t matter if the person finds you physically unappealing once you’re on the date? I’ve got news for you: It’s not.

6. You in your wedding dress
Wow, chicks actually do this? I have no words.

7. Photo with a kid that isn’t your kid
I personally think pictures of children – even your own – are inappropriate on dating sites, but maybe my opinion is a little bit extreme. At the very least, don’t post pictures of other people’s kids on your profile. That’s creepy. It also gives the impression that you have children, which is likely to turn off many potential matches – even the ones that love kids. Any single parent will tell you how difficult dating is with children. Why would you purposefully make it harder on yourself?

8. Sunglasses in every picture
This one is pretty much summed up in #5. Stop hiding what you look like. We’re going to find out, eventually. Actually, we probably won’t because we won’t even bother meeting you.

9. No pics that show below the neck
Maybe you’re trying to get your foot in the door with the more superficial users who might click away because you don’t fit into a size 0, but do you really want to date those people, anyway?

10. Only one picture or nothing at all written in the profile
I see this a lot. I usually chalk it up to pure laziness. Or perhaps these people are taking the superficial nature of the apps a little too far. Yes, we do need to know that we’re physically attracted to you, but we also want to know we’ll have something to talk about on our date.

11. the only thing you have in your profile is “follow me on instagram”
I am baffled by the trend of putting your Instagram handle on a dating site, but maybe that’s because my personal Instagram account is just that: personal. I don’t want a bunch of horny Tinder strangers looking through pictures of my dog or the barbecue I had last weekend. When I see this, I tend to think that this person is either too lazy to write a proper profile and wants me to do all the investigative work myself (not gonna happen), or they judge their own worth by the number of strangers who want to see photos of what they had for dinner last night. No thanks.

12. Giving a list of qualifications that we must meet and requesting we swipe left if we don’t meet them
I don’t see this very often in men’s profiles, but my male friends complain about this a lot, so I assume we ladies are the main offenders. I don’t have the space here to tell you all of the reasons this is a bad idea, but I think the article writer’s comment should tell you everything you need to know:


All in all, I think this is great advice. Are any of you brave enough to defend your use of any of these tactics? Let’s hear it in the comments.

* Statistic made up, but probably not far off.

About Misty Manson

Misty Manson is addicted to dating and has decades of real-world experience and field-tested wisdom to share. A longtime contributor to several dating and sexuality sites, Misty currently shares her exploits and tips on her blog, This commitment-phobic playgirl won't tell you how to get a ring on your finger, but she will tell you how to score that first date and give you tips to keep them coming back for more. Besides, "who's got time for love when dating is so much fun?"